So we forget that it's not just the exam students who are stressed up and down the country today - so are their whole houses, family homes, parents and siblings - they have been walking on egg-shells for weeks now!
There have been many tears since the mock results and some schools may not have helped by sending home letters in the last few weeks advising students to drop down in levels - at this stage of the game that is pointless - no one should drop a level - JUST GO FOR IT!
Chances are you need the points at that level, so a "pass" Leaving Cert is no use to you - schools seem to be out of touch with this reality! So you have this shot make it a good one and if it doesn't work out then worry about what to do next but it's very important at this stage to remain positive and put all the doubts in a large black box well out of the way.
In 1925 Dr. Elizabeth Hurlock showed in a study that students who were prasied and encouraged got vastly different results from those who were not or were critisised...
By the end of the fifth day, the results showed:
Those given praise – 71% improvement
Those criticized – 19% improvement
Those ignored – 5% improvement
This is huge and has been known since 1925 so why are we still giving students such a hard time at such critical stages in the exam process? What I have to explain to parents on repeat loop at this time of the year is that your daughter or son is not the same person they were in February of this year - 4 months is a lifetime in the development of a person between the ages of 15 and 18... so much has happened, they have changed their appearance, their friends, their music taste and so on - they have been learning so much information and working so hard to understand how to study, how to answer questions and most of all they have learnt from their mistakes in the mocks! So why would you think they were the person they were 4 months ago and would get the same result now?
So steps of what you can all do for the next 2 and bit weeks:
1: Totally believe in your child - defend them to anyone who doesn't and stick up for them - It will mean the world to them!
2: Somehow mange to teleport them to where they need to be - stress free and for them to always be early - Know their schedule for them, they have enough to think about!
3: Just make sure they have nice clothes to wear, snacks, water, tool kit - batteries for their calculators - remember to just hand it to them! They won't remember their heads right now..
4: Feed them really well - all their favorite foods and make sure they eat well between the end of the exam and the start of the next or the start of study for the next day..
5: Make them finish at least 30 minutes to an hour before bed time - have some nice time, a walk is fantastic.
6: Make sure they don't sleep surrounded by study notes - clear the sleeping space.
7: Make sure they take off the first Saturday of the first exam week - it's a very intense three day start with major subjects and not always their best specialist subjects - they need to pace themselves for their good topics the following two weeks - it's a lot of pressure and they need to totally step out for one day! Go to the mountains, beach, walking, cycling, film anything just away from it all.
8: Let everything go - people become very controlling of silly things when they are stressed - where did this go - why was this moved - ignore ... get siblings to ignore and not lose the plot too!
9: Repeat point one it's the most important one - believe in them - don't go on about alternatives right now - they have to go for their dreams in full right now and really see them to achieve this - the alternative is an August conversation not a June one!
10: Tell them they are great at least 50 times a day! more if you can squash it in ...
If the way we are was purely genetic or environmental - kids in the same family would be the same. They would react to situations and challenges in the same way. Your birth order wouldn't matter. Children from abusive or alcoholic families would act out their challenges in the same ways. Kids from highly nurturing environments would all turn out perfect. Issues such as self-harm and eating disorders would not exist. All kids in all families would feel identical to their siblings and parents. No-one would ever feel like a misfit.
So, our personalities determine how we react and what we do. They determine an integral part of who we are. The most important part. For example: No two dyslexics from the same family in the same school with the same challenges will be the same. They won't get the same results. They won't be good or bad at the same subjects.
The family and school environments are the same. The dyslexia is genetic and inherited with that same family. But their coping strategies, reactions and lives will be completely different.
This is why personality matters so much in education. It is why one size doesn't fit all and why just because we focus on the dyslexia that education has not appeared to change for the better. When we focus on personality needs - everything changes. Then we can help anyone to be successful regardless of any issues, difficulties or differences.
This is at the crux of what’s different about the Psychology of Success because you’re looking at not just what makes up people or what their challenges are - you’re looking at what they need in their personality to succeed. Plus, looking at the effects generationally that have been built up environmentally but concentrating on their reaction to it because of who they are.
Dr. Naoisé O’Reilly.
The chart, compiled by Dr. Naoisé O’Reilly, shows just how close the statistics really are and why everything is possible in high level Football.
Teams obsessed with their small sphere forget the overall statistics and what is really happening as a whole in the game. They miss the bigger picture by concentrating on Players’ legs. Games are not won by focusing solely on feet and legs!
Look at the chart and see how it takes very little to tip the balance - in either direction - win or lose.
Four games into the M.L.S. this season and the statistics are almost equal. Tie/draw is what is going to make or break Teams this year.
Across the Atlantic in the U.K., when Teams are concerned about being relegated or being bottom of the table, they only look as far as the next match and the next team. But when you look at the overall picture from last season - it is almost equal across the board in all of the Leagues - regardless of Country and Continent.
Marie O’Riordan: Fortune Top 40 Mentor, International Honorary Award Winning Philanthropist, National T.V. Award Winning Short Filmmaker, Third World Documentary Maker, Journalist & Broadcaster.
Dr. Naoisé O’Reilly: Expression Developist™, Personality Theory Researcher, Educationalist, Mentor, Physical Oceanographer, Observational Scientist & Big Data Research Scientist.
Together they Mentor Gold World Champions and Teams who need success through custom breakthrough methods and pioneering personality theory.